How doing a load of laundry changed my life.
I will never forget the pivotal shift. The day that changed everything for me.
It was an extremely random day. But if I’m being honest, everyday of my life at that point felt extremely random.
At this time in my life, my youngest child was in first grade and I was basically a stay at home mom to no one.
Now, I loved and adored my children. Let me get that straight. I loved being with them, spending time with them, teaching them, reading bedtime stories to them, but truthfully-I hated many of the things that went along with being a stay at home mom and a “housewife.” My house or my life looked nothing like the New York pack of badasses that I watched on Desperate Housewives. They’re lives looked anything but desperate.
It all looked glamorous and fabulous to me. Champagne on a monday morning brunch after a private workout with a trainer at a club that I couldn’t even imagine the cost per session. OOOh… it all seemed so glorious. (of course most people’s lives do on camera right? AND let’s be honest, champagne on a Monday morning to a woman who doesn’t leave the house for DAYS would be appealing to anyone-but to actually live that way? no thanks)
Anyway, the housework, the groceries, the school meetings, the cupcake baking for the 3rd time that week all seemed so mundane and boring to me. It didn’t give me life or energy. It depleted me. I did it, but with low energy and no motivation.
I felt lifeless and a bit apathetic about life.
My kids were gone all day at school and by the time they arrived home, I had nothing to show for how I spent my time. Maybe some clean floors and have an afternoon snack ready, but nothing that really lit me up and made me feel satisfied and fulfilled.
I wasn’t 100% sure, but I really didn’t believe deep down that I was meant to live that way.
I believed that deep down I was made for something bigger, something MORE. Not that my kiddos weren’t more, don’t get me wrong...but being a stay at home mom to no one and a housewife was slowly killing my soul.
So it was a day like any other, I was randomly moving the sheets from the washer into the dryer. I got the sheets into the dryer and as I stood there for a moment and watched those sheets spin round and round, I had a thought. That right there is my life. I feel just like those sheets being tossed to and fro in the dryer. I feel like I simply bounce around from one thing to the next.
I felt as though my life had no real deep meaning.
Nothing had true purpose.
And everything felt disconnected and disjointed.
I stood there for a moment consumed by a bit of sadness and overwhelm.
I wanted my life to feel meaningful.
I wanted to know I was making an impact.
I craved to be a part of something that changed lives and had a deep and satisfying purpose.
And yet my life felt anything but purposeful
And in that moment, I didn’t know how, why or what, but I knew that I could be the problem or I could be the solution.
I didn’t want to be bored and unfulfilled anymore. I didn’t want the path of misery.
I wanted to be satisfied and making a difference. I wanted to wake up in the morning excited about the day ahead rather than want to pull the covers back over my head and cry.
I would love to tell you that the next steps were laid out for me. That they were simply and easy. That they just appeared. But then I would be out of integrity because I would be lying.
If you are feeling bored and unfulfilled in life perhaps this message resonates with you.
I wish I could give you a 3 step plan on what to do next.
But a 3 step plan wouldn’t help you, because then that would be telling you MY purpose and MY mission, which you may find completely boring and unsatisfying.
Your life is YOUR life. You’ve got a purpose and a calling just like I did. And yours won’t look like mine, and mine won’t look like yours.
But here’s the truth...
You only have one life. Wake up and live it.
You see most of us are busy saying why we “can’t”
I don’t have the time,
I’m not sure
My husband might not like it
My children need me
And we rationalize our dreams and our purpose away until we just feel hopeless and throw in the white flag of surrender and convince ourselves that “life is just supposed to be this way.” Most of us are walking around asleep-numb to the beauty that life has to offer us.
I can assure you-it is NOT supposed to be this way.
Life is delicious, amazing and juicy.
But you’ve got to be awake for it.
And many of you are sleeping, just like I was.
Until there came a day where I didn’t want to sleep anymore.
So what did I do? I did the next thing that felt right.
I stepped out and tried something I had never done before.
I followed my intuition.
Because the pain of sitting in boredom and misery was worse than the pain of what others thought of me, and all the reasons I thought I could “fail.”
I was willing to “fail.” I was willing to look a bit foolish. I was willing to be the topic of other people’s conversations if I meant my happiness and joy.
I was willing to put all the cards on the table to begin to uncover my purpose.
No one should live miserable and unfulfilled.
So dig deep and begin the work of following your heart. It sounds so cliche but it is so true. Your heart/intuition is speaking to you constantly.
You just aren’t always listening.
Life is DELICIOUS
Life is JUICY
And I plan to extract every morsel of goodness that I can from it.
So what about you? Are you awake? Or are you sleeping your life away?
I hope you’ll come up from hiding. I hope you’ll say yes to a juicy life.
I hope you will begin to do the work around discovering what you were made for...your purpose.